Seven random acts of grumpiness
I’ll admit that as the weeks have worn on, my attitude has degenerated significantly. Not my affection for those whom I know and love, but my patience for those strangers, acquaintances, and inanimate objects that I encounter. While I wouldn’t normally offer much comment, in my current state they’re pissing me off.
So this is my twist on the “Seven Random Facts” meme for which I was tagged by LibAnn – seven random acts of grumpiness toward those who are tapdancing on my last nerve. Enjoy – or just give thanks that I don’t shop at your local grocery store.
1. The checker at the grocery store who couldn’t shut her trap long enough to do her job efficiently. I was in line behind the woman she was chatting up, and after watching her pause for several seconds each time she scanned an item in order to carry on her conversation, I moved to the next line where there were three people with full carts ahead of me. Tacy asked why we were changing lines, and I told her – in great detail, without lowering my voice. The upshot of it was that we still made it through the line and out of the store ahead of Chatty Cathy’s BFF, underscoring my decision to switch lines.
2. 99% of the people at Babies-r-Us yesterday. Jesus H. Christ, people – do you think you are the only ones to ever bear children and need to shop for them? Make way, or I will knock you down with this monstrosity that used to be my midsection. I had to say “Excuse me” no less than a dozen times as people stood staring at the shelves, apparently enthralled by mattress pads and baby shampoo.
3. The bratty teenager at Target who was bouncing a rubber ball up and down the aisles. I overheard him comment, “I would never shop here,” which was laughable enough, but when he chucked the ball down an aisle – fortunately empty of shoppers, but the ball hit the shelves and knocked several items down anyway – I caught his eye and told him, “That was really obnoxious,” not that he cared. I should have added, “If you want to act like a jerk, go shop at Wal-Mart.”
4. People who are overly concerned about what they’re owed, what they’re entitled to, what’s coming to them. Please. It’s not the Powerball jackpot or a personal injury lawsuit settlement. You must chill.
5. The presidential candidates. Must so many of you keep making such irrational and thoughtless comments and judgments? Must so many of you keep telling the same tired stories over and over again? One of you looks so ridiculously smug all the time that I cannot stand the thought of seeing that expression for the next four years.
6. Friday night phone calls that really aren’t necessary. Particularly when they’re an untimely response to a matter that’s been discussed to death already. Most especially when I arrive home to find an email that’s basically a carbon copy of the voice mail.
7. All the stuff in this house that isn’t working. The dying fan in the air duct that runs through the crawl space, which makes an intermittent trumpeting noise not unlike a trapped elephant. The leaky kitchen faucet, which will hopefully be fixed today when Kyle replaces the entire sink. The leaky shower door in the master bath (as if I needed another reason to hate my bathroom), which I will address with the aid of a professional next week. The automatic icemaker’s refusal to make ice, which is hopefully still covered under the service plan we bought three years ago. I realize that all of this joy is part of home ownership, but I can’t help longing for the days when we had a mortgage AND a team of maintenance personnel.
Whew. I don’t know if you feel better, but I do.
Not tagging anyone in particular, but if you feel the need to air your own random grumpiness, be my guest.
January 20th, 2008 at 1:21 pm
Great take on that meme! I may have to borrow it soon.
January 20th, 2008 at 2:50 pm
All of the obnoxious people DO go to Wal-Mart. It’s usually been my experience that people only take their kids there when they either aren’t feeling good or need a nap.
If I hear one more screaming, crying baby….
January 20th, 2008 at 3:48 pm
Like the idea! I may very well have to borrow it in the near future!
January 20th, 2008 at 9:32 pm
Great twist on that meme and you got all that off your chest at the same time!
January 20th, 2008 at 9:44 pm
I’m not sure how you managed to single out only ONE presidential candidate as “ridiculously smug.” That took some restraint.
January 20th, 2008 at 11:01 pm
People who bring their sick kids to Sunday school. Stay home, people!
January 21st, 2008 at 9:20 am
Nodding right alone with you to all of it.
January 21st, 2008 at 10:59 am
Listen, sweetie! There’s not enough room on the internet to contain everything that gripes me in one day…let alone in my lifetime thus far. So much so that when I overheard my two sisters talking about which one of them was more of a control freak I asked them where I stood in the evaluation. Without even looking up one of them said, “You’re not so much a control freak. You just complain too much”.
January 21st, 2008 at 1:09 pm
Hi. Loved the list. Saw you mentioned on Mamatulip’s blog so popped over to say congratulations on the impending birth of the boy.
I’ve made 4 of the creatures, and they’re a great thing to have around the place. Just stock up on balls (they don’t really care what kind… tennis, cricket, foot, basket… it’s all the same to them)and start saving. When they hit 13 or so, they inhale enough food in a day to fill a supermarket trolly.
Get ready to enjoy him. Boys are great fun.
January 21st, 2008 at 9:39 pm
I am lovin’ this list. A riot.
There are few things more satisfying than when you switch lines and beat out your original line.
And I feel like we fix three things in our home and 4 more fall apart. Makes me crazy too.
January 23rd, 2008 at 6:50 am
Oh man, for the last 2 1/2 weeks I have been wracked with coughs, which tweaked a nerve, pulled some muscles and has left me sounding like a frog.
As if that isn’t bad enough, now I pee myself every time I cough. Hello? WHAT IN THE FREAK?
I’m not even on my period and I’m wearing pads. And don’t even suggest for me to get back into life with Depend or I’ll cough on you.