“If you have the means, I highly recommend picking one up.”
Back at the height of the Valley Girl craze (like, omigod!), I had one of those how-to books about being a Val. Apart from the ridiculousness of trying to emulate those who lived in the San Fernando Valley while living in the Miami Valley (that’s Miami of OHIO), the book was pretty entertaining, if not actually instructional. I remember one quote in particular:
“Parents are like Vals who got old and forgot how to drive fast.”
Guilty as charged.
While I have steadfastly refused to join the legions of minivan driving moms (not that there’s anything wrong with that), there’s something about the presence of an infant seat carefully secured in the middle of the backseat that sparks a change in driving habits and vehicle choices, regardless of whether or not that seat is occupied.
(And if there’s an infant seat, that presumes there’s a backseat, which eliminates all the two-seaters.)
Let’s face it: Driving like a badass is just not fashionable when you’ve got a bundle of joy (or tears, as the case may be) back there. And in some mom-mobiles, like the Saturn SL we had when Tacy was an infant, driving like a badass is beyond the limitations of the vehicle itself – even on the New Jersey turnpike, where one must drive like a badass in order to survive.
(I never drove all that well on the turnpike, not even in Kyle’s old Miata. Fast, yes. Skillful, eh.)
So I was cautiously excited to receive an invitation from GM to come test drive some of their latest and greatest vehicles at their proving grounds. Cautious because I recognize my own limitations, but excited to see them once again – this time, from the inside of a Cadillac CTS, a Pontiac Solstice, a Saturn Sky, and (gulp) even a Corvette.
And then my driver’s license went MIA.
I’d taken it out of my wallet to go somewhere or do something that required no money, only proof that I was legal behind the wheel, and had failed to return it to its proper spot. I turned my bags and my pockets and my mind inside out to no avail.
So I was forced to drag out the nine-and-a-half year-old passport (which is not youthfully fetching, but actually quite frightening) in order to board the plane to Detroit. I wasn’t sure how well a passport would suffice in place of a driver’s license on the proving grounds, but I really had no other choice at that point.
I was denied. A very unsympathetic lady put a scarlet letter A “NO DRIVE” sticker on my name tag and sent me off to the course.
It could have been worse; she could have sent me back to the airport.
The good people of the GM social media communications team had saved some lunch for me, and one of their team members – Natalie – sat down to chat while I ate. When she heard that I was forbidden to drive, she offered to drive with me as her passenger. I enthusiastically accepted.
We got in the CTS first. She turned to me and said, “I’m not the best driver out here, but I’ve taken some courses. If I scare you, please tell me and I’ll slow down.”
Scare me? Ha! It was better than a roller coaster ride. I could hardly keep up my end of the conversation; I was beaming and laughing the whole time. And when we got into the convertibles, my hair blew everywhere and I really did feel like I was on a roller coaster.
“I think I need to find some childless friends with hot cars,” I told her.
It turned out to be to my advantage that I’d lost my driver’s license. If I’d been driving, I don’t think I would have had nearly as much fun. Honestly, I saw more of what these cars can do with someone else – someone much more skilled – at the wheel.
I loved riding in the other vehicles that were more of the mom-mobile variety – including the new hybrid versions of the GMC Yukon and Chevy Suburban – and those that I’d probably never get an opportunity to see otherwise – like the Hummer H2 and H3. I didn’t ride in the GMC Acadia, but I checked it out from fender to bumper and was amazed to discover a three-prong outlet located in the front console, accessible from the passenger seat or the second row. No need to drain the laptop battery; just plug in! Heck, you could even plug a breast pump in there.
But it was the fast cars, the ones with manual transmissions, the ones that had no room for a carseat, that were my favorites. It’ll be many years before we have room in our family and room in our budget for a purely fun car, so it was a real treat to check those out.
To GM and Natalie, thanks for indulging my inner badass (in addition to bringing me to Detroit and putting me up).
October 2nd, 2007 at 10:30 am
Damn – that sounds like fun. I confess to driving like a junior badass, flying up the Taconic sometimes.
October 2nd, 2007 at 11:03 am
This is one of the secret pleasures of traveling, I rent a different car every week and get to test drive them. I am always excited when I get a convertible or a mustang. So much fun.
October 2nd, 2007 at 11:08 am
Glad you had fun, even if it was second hand! This reminds me of ages ago when I went to California on Buick’s dime to test-drive a car. It was only after a day on the course that I told the PR dude that, living in NYC, I hadn’t been behind the wheel of a car in a good 5 years. He turned pretty pale.
October 2nd, 2007 at 12:39 pm
oooh – now that’s a sweet invite! and a good way to go about test-riding, too.
i’m avoiding minivans like the plague – we’re seriously considering a crossover for our soon-to-be 2nd vehicle and it is, so we’ve recently read, targeted directly at the 30-something crowd that now has kids but doesn’t want to “give up driving”. kinda sad to be so readily slotted…
October 2nd, 2007 at 2:01 pm
I love the Ferris reference!
October 2nd, 2007 at 2:31 pm
That sounds like so much fun!
I’m glad you didn’t diss the minivan…I have one and although I hate how it looks and makes me feel, I love that all 4 kids can fit in addition to a friend every once in a while.
October 2nd, 2007 at 7:47 pm
how did you get on a list to do something as fun as this? and i’m with you… i’d rather have someone else drive so i could just sit back and enjoy – with my hair flying.
October 2nd, 2007 at 7:52 pm
I’m always impressed with your little side notes…not too many people could actually name the San Fernando Valley as the location of the height of the Valley Girl phase. I grew up there.
Like, totally!
October 2nd, 2007 at 8:10 pm
Aww, I love this post! Because I remember that moment when I adjusted the rear view mirror of the car and saw Toni’s teeny little bootied feet and realized that I would never ever drive the same way again. Precious, precious cargo.
October 3rd, 2007 at 10:36 am
HA! You need to have goals Julie! Ours is to go pick up a convertible on the way home from dropping AC off at college.
15 years and counting.
October 3rd, 2007 at 10:48 am
That was fun. It was such a treat to get to see you out there. I’m furiously finishing up a couple projects then I’ll put my ‘review’ up – something along the lines of – If you ever have a chance to drive a Corvette on a closed course – DO IT!