“You might as well leave, because I’m not.”
Monday morning was damp and gray. The girls were curled up on the sofa, and I had logged on to the Rec Center website to see when Tacy’s swimming lessons were scheduled to begin.
We had ten minutes to get to the Rec Center. Whoops.
“Tacy, get your bathing suit on and grab a towel. You’ve got a swimming lesson in ten minutes!” I ordered.
Both girls leaped to attention – Tacy headed upstairs, and CJ began pulling up her dress.
“No, CJ. Not you,” I told her.
“Mousie swim!” she insisted.
“I’m sorry, sweetie. Only Tacy.”
The tantrum commenced. She screamed as I fastened her into the car seat. She screamed all the way to the Rec Center. She screamed as I carried her into the locker room, where her cries echoed off the tile, making them all the more piercing. And she screamed and flailed on my lap at the side of the pool for a full twenty minutes. Being so close to the pool without being allowed to get in was pure torture for her.
Nearby, a senior citizens’ water aerobics class was in progress. I caught a few glances from the participants, but frankly, I was too busy maintaining control over CJ to pay much attention.
So I was quite surprised when a woman approached us, motioned to CJ and said, “She’s being very loud.”
I smiled apologetically and replied, “I know. I’m sorry. She just wants to get in – ”
She cut me off. “It was rude of you to keep her in here while we were having our class. You should have taken her out.”
I was taken aback. “I’m sorry she disturbed your class, but I have another child here taking a lesson, and I will not leave her alone.”
She pressed on. “You should have taken her out.”
I shook my head and told her, “It’s over and done with.”
“No, it’s not,” she insisted. “You should have – ”
This time, I cut her off. “Again, I’m sorry she disturbed your class, but you might as well leave, because I’m not.” And I turned away from her, effectively ending the conversation.
There’s a difference between a swimming lesson and a meal at a restaurant. And there’s a difference between parents who try valiantly to maintain control (and their composure as well) and parents who carelessly let their children run amok.
September 13th, 2007 at 6:02 am
Good for you. Reminds me exactly of what happened with us on vacation when Rosie was acting up. I don’t know why certain people feel they are entitled to absolute silence in all situations. (And most of all, I don’t know why they need to share their opinions of our parenting.) Geez.
September 13th, 2007 at 6:21 am
Word.
Well handled, Julie.
September 13th, 2007 at 6:45 am
I’m stunned. It’s amazing how people feel they can say anything to you (that they would never dream of saying at any other time) simply because you have a child that is acting out.
Well handled. Far better than I would have handled it, I’m sure.
September 13th, 2007 at 6:56 am
Good for you. That woman was rude with a capital R!
September 13th, 2007 at 7:08 am
UGH. That just plain sucks. Although I’m surprised they actually heard you being senior citizens and all. They must have had REALLY good hearing aides.
September 13th, 2007 at 7:14 am
WOW. It’s one thing to say but to keep pressing you? That’s just plan rude. I’m proud of you for standing your ground. You don’t leave a small child alone in a swimming lesson! My jaw is still hanging open contemplating this one..
September 13th, 2007 at 7:20 am
Well done. By that point, I would have absolutely no patience left & I would’ve pushed her in.
September 13th, 2007 at 7:36 am
I agree with Kristen. If it happens again, tell her that she and her swim buddies should turn their hearing aides down.
September 13th, 2007 at 8:01 am
LOL at Cat’s comment. You showed geat restraint!
I’m still steamed over the woman who wouldn’t switch seats with me on a recent airplane trip so I could sit with Opie. Instead of meekly asking someone else to swap, I should have parked my toddler next to her and asked her how she’d like to hang out with him for the next few hours.
September 13th, 2007 at 8:05 am
God I hate mean people.
You poor thing. You had a disgruntled tot having a tantrum on one side and a bitchy old lady having a tantrum on the other side. What a shame the old biddy’s mom wasn’t there to take her outside.
September 13th, 2007 at 9:13 am
Oh. my. god. Really? You were much more polite than I would have been. Awfully ballsy of her to demand silence at a SWIMMING POOL!
September 13th, 2007 at 9:42 am
That sucks. Sometimes I hate seniors. I may even hate myself when I’m a senior. Damn curmudgeons! They have selective memory loss! I’m sure their kids were perfect and they never had to deal with a public tantrum.
Assuming she was a senior. If she wasn’t, then I’ll change my rant to bitch about the “child free”.
September 13th, 2007 at 9:59 am
Wait. Aren’t rec centers SUPPOSED to be noisy? It’s not the library FFS. You handled this way better than I would’ve!
September 13th, 2007 at 10:25 am
Good for you for not backing down. Does that woman think she owns the place or something? Kids cry. It happens.
I’ve become an expert at tuning out tantrums. She should try it.
September 13th, 2007 at 10:38 am
That sucks. My daughter did the same thing when my son took a swimming class. I can’t wait to hear what happens next week!
September 13th, 2007 at 11:43 am
I cannot believe that woman would keep at you like that or even say that to begin with. Good grief! Some people have no sense.
September 13th, 2007 at 12:00 pm
I’m going to sound like a heel, but I’m going to say it anyway and risk it.
I LOVE my grandmother’s generation. LOVE IT. I love how hard they worked, how well they saved, how prepared they were for anything, and ALL THAT.
WHAT I HATE is how they think children should be seen, not heard. On THAT I think they missed a world of truly amazing relationships with their children and well…they were just a tad bit too firm and too “everyone is looking at me” and too “this is for his own good.”
Did they freakin’ turn off their hearts? Where is the switch?
I’m so glad you really spoke firmly with her to let her know you heard and disagreed.
GAH! I can’t even imagine.
September 13th, 2007 at 12:23 pm
OMSH, you don’t sound like a heel at all – at least, not to me. I agree with you. And sadly, it does seem like many people with grown children have forgotten their own experiences and have lost the perspective they should have gained with their years.
September 13th, 2007 at 12:34 pm
Nicely done. I wish for that kind of gall sometimes – yours, not hers. I’m usually too timid.
September 13th, 2007 at 12:50 pm
Way to go! Kudos to you for speaking up to such a rude person. Like Maggie, I probably would’ve been too timid.
September 13th, 2007 at 12:58 pm
I can’t imagine what I would have said to her.
But I wouldn’t have left either.
September 13th, 2007 at 1:33 pm
I don’t think I could have picked my jaw off the floor in time to talk reasonably to such a rude person. Kudos to you for keeping your composure.
September 13th, 2007 at 1:45 pm
I adore your response. I can’t believe you didn’t curse!
September 13th, 2007 at 5:11 pm
You GO girl…what a cranky old dragon. I hope and pray I am never like that!
September 13th, 2007 at 8:49 pm
The nerve.
September 14th, 2007 at 12:07 pm
You handled it a lot better than I would have. Old bat and large body of water? I smell a murder.
September 14th, 2007 at 12:47 pm
As I told you, the day old ladies start WHISPERING LIKE THIS in the movie theaters, is they day they can tell you to be quiet around hte pool.
September 14th, 2007 at 12:48 pm
oops – that would be STOP whispering like this
I’m tired.
September 14th, 2007 at 3:26 pm
I cannot believe that women had the gall to do that.
September 14th, 2007 at 3:58 pm
Seriously? What kind of asshat give someone a bunch of shoulds? Especially another mother. Good for you for telling her to mind her business.
September 14th, 2007 at 5:25 pm
We have a saying in our family: “Shoulds” are bogus. Whenever someone makes a statement that includes “should,” it is usually totally untrue and unrealistic.
September 14th, 2007 at 6:19 pm
How rude!! Obviously this woman did not have any children of her own. With an attitude like that, I’m not surprised she was unable to find a man to procreate.
You handled it like a pro! My hats off to you for standing your ground!
September 14th, 2007 at 7:03 pm
Good for you. You had as much right to be there as she.
September 15th, 2007 at 1:27 pm
oh dear god… very brilliantly handled. it would have taken a good few minutes just to pick my jaw up off the ground, never mind answer back half as well!
September 16th, 2007 at 6:02 pm
Whoa. That woman was way out of line. Good for you for holding your ground.
September 17th, 2007 at 4:24 am
Good for you!
September 19th, 2007 at 1:41 am
[...] week, she howled like a banshee for twenty solid minutes at the local recreation center because she couldn’t get into the pool. On Saturday morning, she did the same at home because her father went out without her. It’s [...]
September 19th, 2007 at 7:37 pm
What I can’t understand is how the species has managed to survive when just about every senior citizen has apparently never had children themselves – if they had, they would be more understanding, wouldn’t they???
September 2nd, 2009 at 7:04 pm
[...] What’s interesting though is that I have been that mother – the one whose child is causing a scene and annoying a senior. Two years ago, CJ flailed and wailed for a full half-hour during Tacy’s swimming lesson, which led another patron to accost and criticize me for CJ’s behavior. [...]