Too much Aunt Alexandra, not enough Scout and Jem
Somewhere, I had received the impression that Fine Folks were people who did the best they could with the sense they had, but Aunt Alexandra was of the opinion, obliquely expressed, that the longer a family had been squatting on one patch of land the finer it was.
“That makes the Ewells fine folks, then,” said Jem. The tribe of which Burris Ewell and his brethren consisted had lived on the same plot of earth behind the Maycomb dump, and had thrived on county welfare money for three generations.
- To Kill a Mockingbird, Harper Lee
Debbie recently wrote a piece about class – what it means to be working-class versus privileged, and whether those roots should be a source of shame or pride. The comments on her piece spanned a wide range of interpretations – some of which pertained to education, some to how a person makes a living (or doesn’t), and some to haves versus have-nots.
It’s an interesting topic that breaks down into many sub-topics and corollaries: the variety of educational options that are available, from pre-school all the way through doctoral programs, and which are prized most highly; the type of work that people do and the relative value of that work; the material possessions – purchased on credit – that may reflect our needs, but most likely reflect our wants or what we think others think we ought to want.
First, how do you determine the relative value of education? Apart from the basic quantifiers – such as the type of degree, level of degree, and whether it was obtained from a public or private institution – I would submit that the value of education can be judged on two, very different, criteria: 1) How many potential opportunities are likely to result (the practical); and 2) How well it satisfies a desire to learn (the ideal).
Next , how do you determine the relative value of work? The qualifications for nearly any position include minimum education requirements, which ties into the practical criterium above. There’s also the basic criterium of supply and demand – that is, how large are the markets of supply and demand, and how much is that market of demand willing to pay the market of supply? Finally, back to the ideal, how much satisfaction is gained by performing that work? The value of work is a combination of all of these criteria.
Last, how do you determine the relative value of possessions? Ostensibly, the more you paid for it, the more it should be worth – but that’s false. With a few exceptions (which still aren’t always a sure bet), possessions don’t typically hold their value, let alone appreciate. If it fulfills a need, it has an inherent value, but not necessarily a market value.
What I find frustrating is that people seek to climb the social ladder by focusing on the accumulation of more and more possessions – to their detriment. Having worked in collections for sub-prime auto loans (read: people who have already overextended themselves one too many times), and attempted to collect past-due monthly payments on luxury vehicles (read: BMWs and Jaguars financed at 17% APR over 72 months), I’ve seen this addiction to “stuff” firsthand.
Colorado has the highest foreclosure rate in the entire United States. As quoted from the linked article, the factors behind these foreclosures include:
- A record glut of unsold homes on the market.
- Huge credit-card debt held by homeowners.
- Homes purchased with no down payments.
- Pre-payment penalties on rising ARMs.
- A record number of bankruptcies.
- Mortgage fraud, which can involve investors, lenders, title insurance companies, real estate agents and appraisers, according to public officials and other experts.
Kyle works as a mortgage loan officer. He sees homeowners in trouble every day. Whenever possible, he helps them better their situation. Unfortunately, sometimes he can’t.
It seems that most people are attempting to improve their social standing – or at least, to better others’ perceptions of their social standing – by seeking material possessions rather than higher education or a promotion at work. And more often than not, these efforts are backfiring.
And it seems that we’d all be better off returning to Scout’s definition of Fine Folks – doing the best we can with the sense – and the stuff – we’ve got. Not only might we relax the standards by which we judge others, but we might also revise our own priorities – to our betterment, not to our detriment.
September 22nd, 2006 at 10:27 am
t seems that most people are attempting to improve their social standing – or at least, to better others’ perceptions of their social standing – by seeking material possessions rather than higher education or a promotion at work. And more often than not, these efforts are backfiring.
I see this all the time just in every day life. It always blows my mind.
September 22nd, 2006 at 10:43 am
What a fantastic post! I love discussions on this topic. Education and intellectual curiosity are so important, and learning never stops in life– even after one has arrived at a chosen profession. And it seems the more I learn, the less I want things advertised on TV.
September 22nd, 2006 at 10:49 am
damn. this is EXACTLY what I was getting at, but was totally incapable of saying. Julie, can I borrow you every time I’m trying to say something smart and up bumbling through it?
perfect.
September 22nd, 2006 at 10:50 am
er, that should’ve been *end up* bumbling.
see what I mean? bumbling.
September 22nd, 2006 at 12:16 pm
Truly “wealthy” people are far, FAR more likely to save than to spend. It’s how they got wealthy in the first place.
My favorite commercial is the one where the Dad shows off all his stuff – his pool, big house, new car, golf club membership, etc and then says “How did I afford all this? I’M DROWING IN DEBT!” all the while with a big shit-eating grin on his face. It’s so true a lot of the time.
September 22nd, 2006 at 1:21 pm
So true, so true. It’s so scary, with so many humungous new homes being built. I just don’t understand where all these people are finding the money to buy them? Oh – it’s credit.
September 22nd, 2006 at 2:46 pm
My fairly wealthy father, who worked to give my mother money to spend, used to shake his head and tell me, “You have to save money to have money.”
September 22nd, 2006 at 4:57 pm
Honestly? Sometimes I do buy things to make myself feel “more important” than I really am. But I have Payless shoes and TJ Maxx purses, too, so it isn’t all greed.
I don’t have debt, other than my mortgage.
For me, my interest in “designer duds” was actually the flip side of some of what you’ve explained here: I have a “high” education, used to have an impressive job, but found no happiness. So now I’ve embraced the more societally trendy things in an attempt to “blend in” and be recognized for some of the fluffy stuff rather than the brainy stuff.
September 22nd, 2006 at 6:19 pm
I like to think about the saying, “The more you have, the more you have to lose.”
Here at House of Joy, it seems like we are constantly trying to get RID of THINGS…and let me tell you THINGS are sneaky. They just keep getting in the house.
I am the Queen of the Thrift Stores. Why buy a new THING when the people who love THINGS are buying so many of them and discarding them right away? All the THINGS anyone could ever want find their way to the thrift store with great regularity and for the low, low price of $2.
When I’m done. Back the THINGS go.
I need one of those drive through banking teller machine things with a giant tube between my house and Goodwill’s drop off station.
I guess my admission of the love of USED THINGS likens me to the Ewells and I’m ok with that.
September 22nd, 2006 at 6:31 pm
It’s scary to think of all the people that have overextended themselves. We almost did that by buying more house than we could afford, but we stepped back, thought about what was most important, and settled for a smaller house so that I could afford to stay home PT with the baby. We could have gotten and even smaller home so I could stay home FT, but we weren’t quite that disciplined.
September 22nd, 2006 at 7:42 pm
I grew up in something of an “old money” area (despite us not having any of it, old or otherwise) where people didn’t show what they had. The kids drove the old family cars if at all. There was no ostentation. It blew my mind being introduced to the “new money” kids through camp or other activities, where it was expected that you get a Porsche at 16 along with a new nose. It’s such an odd value system to me.
You seem to subscribe to my dad’s old adage: You just don’tknow what people are worth until you see their bank accounts.
September 22nd, 2006 at 9:25 pm
First, can not resist a post with title and quote from “To kill a mockingbird”. Great post and so true…having come from not much at all and lived in proximity to great affluence, I am more and more leaning towards the not-much. There is a lot to be said for contentment. I would take Scout as my kid any day, if only I could parent like Atticus Fitch.
September 22nd, 2006 at 10:00 pm
Great stuff to think about. Also – how do you bring up your kids to have the “right” values about class and money?
My friend from (public) high school had a schoolteacher mom who taught at a private school. They sent her younger brother to the private school, since they could get a discounted tuition, and he grew up spewing his misery that their family was poor, poor, poor! They had a perfectly nice middle class life, but all his friends were from rich families. That wasn’t exactly what they had in mind when they sent him to private school.
I want my son to have nice things when it matters, but not feel like he’s entitled to everything – they should be a treat. Does that make any sense?
September 22nd, 2006 at 10:07 pm
i have always wondered how people have so much. it seems everywhere i look, people have houses and cars and other things that, when i realize how much they are spending on them, make me think i’m in the wrong business. then i realized most people are living beyond their means – way beyond their means. which then makes me wonder how miserable they are having the burden of being in over their heads.
there are 6 houses for sale in my neighborhood – most have been on the market for 6 months or longer. why? did the bottom finally fall out for them? things right now aren’t good it seems.
we have no debt – other than the house and one car payment. we’re not saving a lot, but we’re not drowning either. i’m very happy to not be living with that stress.
September 22nd, 2006 at 10:33 pm
Oh Scout. I have loved her for….too many years to put down. Many. Her words are wise. If the world could live by them, believe them….a better world it would be.
September 23rd, 2006 at 3:26 am
I’m a reformed shopaholic. When I met my husband I was drowing in credit card debt and living way beyond my means. It’s scary the way the credit card companies set up kiosks on college campuses and sign the kids up on their first day of school. That first credit card is such a huge temptation. Buy now…pay later! And pay and pay and pay. I was paying the minimum on my credit card bill, not even realizing that I was just paying off the interest. Thank goodness I married a man with good economic horse sense. He knew the key to saving was living beneath your means. Not at or above it. I blame shows like Life Styles of the Rich and Famous. LOL! People get a taste of the good life (or what they THINK is the good life) and couple that with a pervading sense of entitlement that has crept into American culture and whamo. (Time to get out those scissors and cut up those credit cards!)
September 23rd, 2006 at 6:24 am
I was thinking about something that is similar to this post — in the same vein, I guess — that today, everything is BIGGER. Bigger is better. I wanted to run into the corner store and get Julia a small bottle of orange juice for a long car trip last weekend and all I could find were HUGE bottles. Bottles that I couldn’t even finish, that were inappropriate to hand to a three-year-old. I can remember when stores used to sell juice boxes and now they’re stocking like, two-litre bottles of OJ.
Makes me shake my head.
September 23rd, 2006 at 7:43 am
Sheesh!!! I can’t even imagine.
September 23rd, 2006 at 8:33 am
GReat post. I recently re-read “TO Kill a Mocking Bird” and fell in love all over again.
Your post is so true and so sad. I watch bigger and bigger McMansions going up everyday and wonder how big is finally going to be enough? When will they feel like they’re some body?
September 23rd, 2006 at 8:41 am
Julie, this is a great post to get people thinking and a great quote from one of my all time favorite books. My mother-in-law was a realtor for many years and helped us buy our first condo. I’ll never forget her warning us to not max our mortgage out and become “house poor.” I definitely live in an area where McMansions are built right on the highway (I guess to flaunt their wealth?) People just seem to want more and more stuff and bigger and bigger houses. It seems like we’re teaching our children that wealth and material posessions are the ultimate goal in life. Trying to be a better person, whether through continuing education or furthering one’s career or volunteering in the community or spending quality time with one’s family…that’s really what matters. Not the size of your home. Or debt. And sheesh I can’t HANDLE the stress of debt. Even though I long for a bigger home (with more than one tiny full bathroom) we’re on a strict three year plan to get rid of our debt. So we say no to a lot of material things right now. But at least we’re not going into debt furnishing a house we can’t afford.
September 23rd, 2006 at 10:12 am
It’s an age-old discussion we have in our family all the time. Not just my immediate family, but the one living beyond their means. My sister, for example, will do whatever it takes to “get stuff” that she doesn’t have the money for and she’s a single mom. We, of Two Income, find that we simply DO WITHOUT when we don’t have it. Why is this so hard to understand?
Not to muddy the waters, but when speaking of “class” she will often bring up that I “really could have that expensive thing I’ve been eyeing” because we both have college-plus degrees and she doesn’t have any. This isn’t a good enough excuse, but I also don’t think it’s because we’re more educated and therefore put ourselves into unnecessary debt. We’ve got enough debt already, thankyouverymuch.
Also? I love you, and I mean LOVE you, for quoting the book I re-read every single year. My only problem with the movie is when they cut out my favorite chapter. Geez. What a wasted opportunity. But still! In the movie when the minister says, “Stand up, Jean Louise. You’re father’s passing.” – oh. my. lord. I cry every single time.
September 23rd, 2006 at 1:55 pm
Oh, that line makes me cry too…
I think about this all the time. Especially with regard to raising sensible children in a world that has lost all sense. I started to notice it most when friends of mine would marvel that T and I had bought an apartment in Park Slope when they couldn’t *imagine* affording one. I would look at their huge diamond rings and my (ahem) modest one and shake my head. For whatever reason, a big, honkin’ rock was more important to them and they couldn’t even grasp how insane that was.
September 23rd, 2006 at 8:23 pm
Oh boy, where to start. Husband and I just spent five years paying a mountain of credit card debt that we racked up when we were young, stupid, and both gainfully employed. We made a conscious decision to alleviate our debt and then to live without credit, with the exception of car and home loans. However, we resolved to have only one car payment.
Yes, we sometimes have to put off large purchases. Yes, we sometimes have to watch our budget very closely. Yes, we have to save (novel idea) for things. But it’s very liberating not to dread opening the mail every week.
People wonder why we have an older home in some disrepair, or why husband drives a late model jeep, or why we don’t have the latest in home decor and furnishings. My sister-n-law has had three, count ‘em three new living room suites in ten years. She actually said to me once…”Why don’t you get a job so you can redecorate?” We choose for me to be home with the kids, we choose to live without credit cards. That means we simply cannot affor to keep up with the Joneses, but it’s a decision we are very happy with.
We roll our eyes when friends and acquaintances drive up in their $40,000 SUV’s, knowing they can hardly pay the electric bill to light their $600,000 home. Everybody knows that he works at Kroger. Do they think we don’t know that they’re living on credit?
I don’t know why it’s come to this. I think we’ve become a nation of self-absorbed immediate gratification addicts with entitlement issues. Nobody thinks they should have to save or work for anything anymore.
September 24th, 2006 at 8:44 am
The second to the last paragraph you wrote says it all and I realize it’s already been quoted here. Anyway, our debt is student loans and we don’t even own our home yet due to the hubs still being in school and we don’t know where will land permanently right now.
We buy used stuff, have one car, live in an older home, and the kids wear hand me downs,etc, etc… We don’t waste much money. We aren’t the type of people to try and keep up with everyone else. If you can’t afford to pay for something and you buy it anyway you are going to be miserable atleast for a while…
The hubs and I know some wealthy people but you couldnt tell it by the cars they drive or the clothes they wear because they SAVE it. Smart wealthy people save their money.
Also, I think shopping as in constantly buying stuff you dont need going out on shopping sprees a couple times a week is kind of like getting high. You want something to make you feel better and for a little while buying all those material things make you feel better but it is short lived. Just my opinion…
September 24th, 2006 at 1:23 pm
I don’t value people based on money, education or career. More is not better for all three.
I lean to having great appreciation for people with good hearts and street smarts (read common sense). I’d rather sit down with a person that I can have a great conversation with over any of the superficial qualifiers any day. Those are my kind of fine folks. Yes, sometimes those people do come with money, education and a big career and sometimes they don’t.
Also people with common sense in general don’t over extend themselves. They also realize that by having more material possessions they are not better people.
September 24th, 2006 at 1:53 pm
Funny you should write this. I spent last night with some people who are of my in-laws generation. One woman in particular was from Texas by way of Wisconsin and she remarked that she was astounded by the number of “mansions” we had here in Massachusetts. McMansions is what everyone is calling them. But if my group of friends and acquaintances is any indication of the amount of wealth that is out there, I just can’t figure out where people are getting the money for these houses. I think there are a lot of people out there who have over extended their credit lines.
September 24th, 2006 at 6:52 pm
Great post.
As I am sure you remember from living in this area, there’s a lot of keeping-up-with-the-jones here. Big houses to fill with expensive furniture, ostentatious luxury vehicles, and big-name employment. (Everyone wants to know what your job is and where you work when you first meet them.) The displays of wealth are astounding.
It’s funny, though, because even though I have the good job and the degrees and a decent paycheck coming in to the house, I’m finding that I have little interest in displays of material wealth. If anything, I’d like to simplify my life and cut back on all the STUFF that we have. It seems like the more I’ve advanced in life, the more I realize that money does not buy happiness. I’d rather focus on being “fine folk” from the perspective of doing good deeds for the community and raising my girls to be good citizens.
September 25th, 2006 at 6:16 am
See I didn’t comment on Debbie’s post because I feel like I’m not balanced enough to comment on it properly. Because I’m firmly entrenched in being poor. No matter how much money I have I always feel like the girl in the kmart clothes and the goodwill shoes.
Why is that? And how can I reassess?
September 25th, 2006 at 7:38 am
Keeping up with the Jones’ is not part of our lifestyle.
We are a family of three that has opted to live car free in our city.
We walk everywhere and take public transportation.
We bought our home wisely and it fits our needs.
We were blessed with being born into middle class families.
I am staying at home to help my daughter to where she will have the confidence to get a University education. She has a learning disability that has to be continualy addressed through the education system.
That being said, I know that my daughter is being looked after because of my education, or my belief that it is imparitive for her to be given the opportunity to succeed in academia. I believe that the concentration that happens in the early years are what will lead to success in a post graduate life. I have taken on the school system and have all in place for my child to get a proper education.It has been a full time job and a lot of dotting of the i’s and crossing of the t’s.
I have had meetings with educators and have done research into programmes.
I know of another family that has a boy with a learning disability and through lack of their education, they do not challenge the system, they think their boy is just fine.’No boy of theirs is stupid’ and through the ignorance of the parents this poor boy he is slipping so far down. He is falling through the cracks and the class system I think allows for this.
Through lack of education it is hard to see what an education can give you.